Kirsten 10 july 2014 (18 of 21)

I’ve become an early-riser.

like an upset because she slept through her alarm for the second day in a row and is subsequently missing ballet class in the middle of the July type of early riser.  I’ve become someone who bakes grapefruit (sprinkled with organic brown sugar, to boot) and enjoys it on an enclosed porch with a side of summer rain.  I’ve become someone who takes cold showers and listens to classical music outside the studio.

I’m now someone who hears a piece of music in the background of a movie and becomes obsessed with creating movement in her head. And then maybe dances around the house to said piece of music quite a bit as well (some things don’t change).  But now I’m actually  considering “choreographing” this movement and showing it to people.  eeep.

I’ve become a teacher; someone who spends hours planning barre combinations and rehearses her introduction speech in the car 6 times on the way to that first class.  I’m ‘miss kirsten’.

I am now someone who goes on lunchdates with 70-year-old women because we are friends.  One of the best I have made all summer, in fact.

I now dream of dinner parties and cocktail napkins and candles.  I shop for wine and prefer it over almost any other beverage- I’ll even have just one glass.  I’ve finally unpacked my vintage champagne coupes, gifted from grandma at least 5 christmases ago.  They sit proudly on my barcart- because I now have one of those.   I can spend 30 minutes perusing a store whose entire inventory comprises nothing but olive oil, without getting bored.  And I’m not just there for the free samples- I leave with a bottle of my own for the fancy dinners I now cook myself.

I am now a person who books plane tickets for a 10-hour flight that I will board alone.

I am someone who believes in skincare as makeup, but also have a strange new passion for the art of applying a full face of it.  Also, I wear lipstick now, and have 5 different shades in my purse at any given time.  Where did this habit of carrying the whole collection at once come from?  We may never know.

I am someone who says ‘yes’ to (almost) everything, and someone who feels incomplete without fresh flowers next to her bed.  I am a person who cuts a vacation short to attend morning kickboxing class, just to work on that jumping rear kick.  I’m also a ninja.

I am someone who actually misses technique class and anticipates the start of the new season a whole month in advance.  I’m also someone who gets very excited when they see their name in an article on Dance Spirit.  (I had to link that one, i’m just too tickled not to share!)

I’m growing up, you guys.  And it’s completely vivifying.




photo by Sheila K Lawrence

ps* I decided to use a more casual editorial style, with short sentences and laid back punctuation, to express the relaxed tone of this post.  I wrote most of this a few weeks ago in a journal one morning when I overslept, and wanted the sleepy, ranting tone of that entry to follow it here.  That’s all.  Adios muchachos.

8 thoughts on “identity

  1. Pingback: on set at the columbus | Setting The Barre

  2. Pingback: a new year’s resolution | Setting The Barre

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